Chuck Norris Facts – Apparently Does Not Include Ted Cruz

Ted Cruz camp came out in front of Chuck Norris this week, and having read any of the Chuck Norris facts does not seem like a good idea, and reported that he would be endorsing the Texas senator. Well, as it is a known fact that at night the boogey man checks his closet for Chuck Norris it might behoove the Presidential hopeful to keep his closets ajar and one eye open. As it seems the man who doesn’t do push ups but instead pushes the Earth down is none too happy about the apparent misstep from Ted Cruz. Over the weekend, the martial artist was supposedly going to show up at at campiagn rally for Cruz. Imagine the embarrassment when the man who has a fist in his beard was told he had to be somewhere he didn’t want to be and to endorse someone he’s not sure he likes.

It was Keep The Promise PAC that had first reported that Chuck Norris was attending the rally and that he was behind Ted Cruz. But Norris himself on facebook cleard the air, “I would like to clarify for the record that I have NOT officially endorsed any candidate for president, contrary to what has been widely reported in the media”. Being that Ted Cruz is from Texas and Chuck Norris played a Texas Ranger on TV that might sting a little. Also after a win in Kansas and Maine Caucus’ an endorsement like this could put additional wind in his sails.

Now we did have our spies reach out to Chuck Norris but we’re still waiting for them to return. And since outer space exists because it is afraid to be on the same planet as Chuck Norris we’re thinking they’re all goners. We did discuss among ourselves that maybe we could politely ask for their return but then we remembered that there is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures that Chuck Norris has allowed to live. So we thank our lucky stars . . . and Chuck Norris.

Here’s a little bit of Ted Cruz on Chuck Norris pajamas?

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Hey yo, this is Jayson from the ICT and I am happy to be a part of the ShowbizSpy network of Spies. My specialty will be reporting on the music industry and stuff that catches my attention. I never miss a great gig and cringe when people in Wichita say there is nothing to to here, when there is tons of Things To Do, if you just look in the right place! Rock On!